Saturday, August 11, 2007

Millvale Mayor And Borough Council Agree: Flooding Three Times In One Week Is Too Much

Resolution Limits Flooding To Only Once A Week

After a poignant comment from an angry Millvale citizen, Millvale’s Borough Council hastily passed a resolution which limits flooding from Girty’s Run to just once a week instead of the three or more occurances which have become commonplace as of late. Millvale Mayor Vincent Cinski happily signed the resolution as well.

“Flooding three times in a week is too much” said Millvale resident Bruce Bruns.

That comment struck a chord with Allegheny County Chief Executive Dan Onorato as well as Millvale’s local government officials. Onorato urgently pressed the Federal Government for help and President Bush’s response was almost instantaneous.

“We’ll have you cleaned up quicker than an IED attack on a hot Iraqi night,” quipped the President in his trademark folksy manner.

The President has followed through on his promise as the Army Corps of Engineers has just arrived in Millvale to properly dredge Girty’s Run.

“When we’re done, we can categorically promise you that this troublesome creek will never overflow its banks more than once a week,” said a high-ranking Corps official. “This is a promise we fully intend to keep.”

No comments: