Man On The Street Poll: Troy Hill

Billy’s Troy Hill Bistro Likes Luke


One waitress and eleven patrons were polled at Billy’s Bistro on Lowrie St in Troy Hill. Only eight of the twelve were city residents, however. The four non-city patrons lived in nearby Reserve Township. Of the 8 Troy Hill residents, 3 were voting for Ravenstahl (38%), 2 for DeSantis (25%), 2 were undecided (25%), and 1 never votes for anyone and plans to not vote for anyone this time around also (13%).

Of the 4 who lived in Reserve, 3 would have voted for Ravenstahl if they could have (75%), 1 was firmly in the DeSantis camp (25%).

I had the house specialty, by the way. The Black Diamond Steak was very tasty and I’d recommend it to anyone who finds themselves in the neighborhood.

The details:

Ravenstahl Supporters:
- Female 1: 30-ish, Republican. Reason for vote: “I just like Luke. He’s young and I like the changes he’s made. I had the opportunity to meet him and I liked what I saw. He has fresh ideas and I’d like for him to continue the changes he’s started.”
- Male Friend of Female 1: 40-ish, Democrat. Reason for vote: “I want him to be able to continue doing what he’s doing now.”
- Fairly Drunk Male: 60-ish, Independent. Reason for vote: “Let me tell you … I hate Democrats. And I also hate Luke’s dad. Be sure to say that I really hate Luke’s dad. But I’m going to be voting for Luke. I think we need to give this boy a chance. Let’s see what he can do. Make sure you remember that I hate Democrats. I really do. Besides, I think DeSantis might be gay. He’s not married, you know.”

DeSantis Supporters:
- Man Sitting Next To Fairly Drunk Male. 50-ish, Democrat. Reason for vote: “I think a little bit of intellect would be nice for a change.” Fairly Drunk Male warned that a DeSantis victory would be a catastrophe; it would turn things upside-down. “Maybe that’s what we need,” said Man Sitting Next To FDM. “Maybe we need things turned upside-down.”
- Friend Of Man Sitting Next To Fairly Drunk Male. 50-ish, Democrat. Reason for vote: “DeSantis is the smarter man. That would be nice for a change.”

Undecided:
- Couple. Both 30-ish, Both Democrats. Both had not made up their minds yet.

Will Not Vote:
- Waitress. 30-ish, Not Registered Anything. Reason for non-vote: “I never pay attention to politics and I never vote for anyone. But I tell you this, if I were voting this time, I would not vote for Luke. He comes in here from time to time and he always leaves a horrible tip. He was in here the other day with some people from the city and some girls. They drank and ate and the bill came to $88 but he only left a $4 tip. No, if I were voting this time, it wouldn’t be for him.”

Man On The Street Poll: East Liberty Soup Kitchen

Alphabet Soup Jumbled, Ds and Rs Swap Places


Twelve volunteer workers were polled at an East Liberty Presbyterian Church soup kitchen this morning. Of the 12 polled, 9 Democrats were voting for DeSantis (75%) and 3 Republicans were voting for Ravenstahl (25%). Which begs the question: Who is the real ‘Lil Bush’ anyway?

The details:

Ravenstahl Supporters
- Volunteer 1: 60-ish Female, Republican. Reason for vote: “I think Bush is a very intelligent man and Luke is intelligent also.”
- Volunteer 2: 20-ish Female, Republican. Reason for vote: “Luke is very intelligent. He got good grades in college.”
- Volunteer 3: 20-ish Female, Republican. Reason for vote: “Luke is young and will take us in a good direction.”

DeSantis Supporters:
- Volunteer 4: 50-ish Male, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke is just plain stupid. That boy is going down!”
- Volunteer 5: 50-ish Female, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke is immature and too young.”
- Volunteer 6: 40-ish Male, Democrat. Reason for vote: “I agree. Luke is too young.”
- Volunteer 7: 20-ish Female, Democrat. Reason for vote: “[Luke’s] stupid!”
- Volunteer 8: 30-ish Female, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke is dishonest. He lied about the SUV and that was the final blow for me.”
- Volunteer 9: 30-ish Female, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke would ruin Pittsburgh.”
- Volunteer 10: 40-ish Male, Democrat. Reason for vote: “I hate [Luke]!”
- Volunteer 11: 50-ish Female, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke is a horse’s ass!”
- Volunteer 12: 30-ish Male, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke is a f*cker.”

First Pist-Gazette Unscientific “Man On The Street” Poll Just In

Brookline: Going for DeSantis?


The Pist-Gazette decided to venture deep into Ravenstahl-Motznik country this evening. An occasion to dine at the Moonlight Café (and Bar) in Brookline turned into the perfect opportunity to spot sample opinions and views from the locals regarding the Nov. 6 mayoral election.

I must say, I’m stunned. Practically stupefied. I expected near universal support for our Boy Mayor in this hotbed of public works, firefighters and Motz Man constituents.

Instead, out of 13 people “polled”, 5 said they were voting for Ravenstahl, 6 (!!!) were voting for DeSantis, and 2 said they were so disgusted they were staying home. Luke gets 5 out of 13! That's a whopping 38% for Luke IN BROOKLINE!!!

(Ms. Pist needs a moment to compose herself before she is able to move on to the details)

Okay, the details …..

Ravenstahl Supporters
- Busboy: Young, 20’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: "Because [Ravenstahl] is young and has that fresh look.”
- Man at Bar: Young, 20’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: Ravenstahl is a personal friend.
- Man at Bar’s Friend: Young, 20’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: “I like [Ravenstahl’s] views better. Except I don’t know too much about DeSantis.”
- 3rd Man at Bar: Young, 20’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke is a good mayor. He gets around a lot. I was just at a party last night where he was at.” (These are honest-to-goodness quotes.)
- 4th Man at Bar: Young, 20’s, Democrat, Marine 3 times in Iraq. Reason for vote: “I want a Democrat no matter what.”

DeSantis Supporters
- Waitress: Older, 50’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Because I haven’t liked the last couple of things he’s done. The car was the last straw.”
- Man at Bar: Older, 50’s, Democrat, has a son in Iraq. Reason for vote: Democrats need change, the city is being run into the ground, we need a sensible man to take charge, golf, golf, SUV.
- Female Friend of Man at Bar: Older, 50’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: She agreed with everything Man at Bar said, but eagerly added she couldn’t wait to vote for DeSantis.
- 2nd Man at Bar: Young, 20’s, Democrat, wearing a Roethlisberger jersey. Reason for vote: “Luke is an idiot.”
- Cousin of 2nd Man at Bar: Young, 20’s, Democrat, just back from Iraq. Reason for vote: "I can't think of one reason to vote for Ravenstahl. I will have to vote for DeSantis.”
- Woman at Bar: Early 30’s, Democrat. Reason for vote: “Luke can’t tell the truth. If you're going to do something, then just do it. But don’t lie about it. And when you go to a concert, you should take your own car.”

Those Staying Home
- Young Couple at Bar: Both 20’s, Democrats. Reason for not voting: "We're done voting for politicians. No matter who it is, they’re all on the take. It’s all just a scam.”

My God, this is Brookline? I hate to say it. I hate to mouth the words so as to maybe jinx a miracle in the making. But maybe Luke is deeper in his own shit than any of us ever thought.

Ms. Pist will be “polling” at other locales throughout the city before election day. It would be enlightening and maybe even entertaining if other bloggers did the same.

What Does It Take To Bring Left And Right Together? The Horrifying Possibility Of Mayor Luke Ravenstahl

Both Endorse Republican Challenger Mark DeSantis


Has the world come to an end? Has hell frozen over? No, not exactly, but close to it. Both the Democratic-leaning Post-Gazette (link) and the Republican-inclined Trib-Review (link) have endorsed Republican underdog Mark DeSantis for mayor of Pittsburgh.

Prior to 9/11, many used to wonder what it would take to unify our country. Voices for the Left and Right had moved so far away from each other, it seemed they could no longer agree whether or not the sky was blue, whether or not the Earth was round. Then came 9/11 and with it a stark albeit brief realization that worse people exist in the world than the opposite party they had vowed to destroy.

Councilman Luke Ravenstahl’s ascendance to the mayoral throne was Pittsburgh’s very own 9/11. Both our major newspapers get it. Both stand united in realizing the horrific implications of an out-of-control Frat Boy running the city as it circles the event horizon of a black hole called ‘bankruptcy’.

The question is, will Mr.& Mrs. Average Pittsburgher get it? Will the myopic government worker who doesn’t understand his very job depends on tax dollars from the private sector get it? Will the mindless voter who gets ‘handed the slate’ be able to muster the wits to rebel against his own DNA corrupted by generations of same-party inbreeding? Will the unions finally understand that there is not one drop of blood left in any Pittsburgh turnips? Even if there was, will they finally admit the turnip-blood will never come from a boy speeding around town in his Batmobile, chasing after celebrities whilst admiring his own reflection?

Unfortunately, the answer to all of the above is probably ‘no’. Ms. Pist believes we Pittsburghers are for the most part hopeless, hapless and clueless. Ms. Pist believes Ravenstahl will win the election and Pittsburgh will continue on the path to its own demise. I guess it’s just what Darwin referred to as 'the process of natural selection’.

Huge thanks to the Post-Gazette and the Trib for standing up and doing what’s right. Mega-Super-Kudos especially to the Post-Gazette who has risked paying subscriptions from the mindless and the myopic. They have instead chosen to retain their journalistic and editorial sanity and integrity, and for this they will have my eternal respect.

“Gumball” Malloy Responds To Charges. Again.

Interviewed By KDKA “Yellow Journalists”. Again.

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More Spin From The Lukester

Luke seen here trying to astral project during his waking hours.

Pittsburgh’s 27-Year-Old Mayor Says The Election Focus Should Be On His Record, Not The Controversies In Which He’s Found Himself

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FOP Deals Ravenstahl One-Two Punch

News Flash!

Kapow! The FOP endorsed Republican Mark DeSantis this afternoon in his bid for mayor of Pittsburgh.

Kablam! They rubbed salt into the wound by comparing *DeSantis* to the much-loved, late Mayor Bob O’Connor:

"We see a lot of the same things in him that we saw in (late Mayor) Bob O'Connor,” said Union Secretary Chuck Hanlon.

Maybe, just maybe the stupor-villian Frat Boy will be run out of Gotham City after all!